This suggests its not the api at fault perhaps. Try disconnecting 3 of the relays and see if it stays connected. Hash out the yaml for the other 3.
It seems like my issue is resolved by only sending out 2.4 ghz wifi. This means that you were right from the beginning @Spiro.
Thanks for your help @Spiro!
Glad you found the problem. If you use bssid with mac instead of ssid and wifi name in the yaml you may be able to force it to only attempt connection to the 2.4ghz. Then you could still run both 2.4 and 5.8ghz with the same wifi name.
I would separate them anyway. I have found many devices (not esphome) getting confused.
Yes, I see other people reporting that and the general advice has been to separate them. I keep them together and so far I havenāt noticed any problem. I wonder could it be down to the router. I have only been using Openwrt.
Maybe you have hacked every firmware you foundā¦ 
For example cinese wifi cameras are potential to behave badly.
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I have a pretty big smart home setup and this is the first time Iāve heard of this 
I use Ubiquiti Unifi for networking, so Iām happy I could resolve this rather quick and easy.
Who knows what will spark off the problem. Perhaps an update on the router,a change to router settings, tiny differences between esp devices or esphome update or just a line of YAML. The law of unintended consequences.
My whole internet went down for 2 days few months ago when the ISP router did an update during the night. I donāt even use it for wifi just as a modem but the new update demanded a longer password but it reloaded the config with a shorter password and refused to connect.
My Chinese cameras are all ethernet and I recently disabled the remote access through the server back in China. I log in through my Wireguard VPN on the Openwrt router.
My router has gone frozen twice in last two years. Both when I was abroadā¦ 