I will answer these in reverse.
Yes, it will in most cases, depending on the type of operation and the types of drives compared, the difference can be substantial. Some low end NVME drives are not any faster than a high end SATA in terms of performance, but can be far worse in terms of reliability. Drive choices are complex, with your use case you probably want both drives, and the SMB server would store the files on the SATA drive, leaving the NVME for applications and program data.
Also a complex choice, if you are running several operating systems or simultaneous applications, multi-threaded is more important, but not with “peaky” loads where a single thread will max out for a long period of time and all other applications are basically idle.
The fan speed varies with cpu temp and load, if the system is kept at an average load of 0.4 or lower, do not expect to be able to hear the fan unless you are close. The 8i5 has a higher TDP than the 7i5, 28W vs 15W, and if you use that power the heat has to go somewhere, that is why it is louder, but also why it is faster.
If you want kodi and the other things on the same device, I cannot say how good your experience will be, since you will need the system to be in an unrecommended configuration. You either need it to run as a program on the host operating system, or as a VM with isolated access to the graphics hardware.
I am using an older i3 NUC for kodi, but the DB is on the server, so the NUC does not need to do any of the heavy lifting or have a lot of memory, uses a gig at idle, about 400MB more playing a 1080p HEVC file, cpu hits 60% on a single core, the other 3 average 15% each, handling network traffic, subtitle rendering, audio decode, etc. a 4X fast forward starts dropping frames hard, so all 4 cores are desired for a good experience.