Much like ZigBee, you have to go through a “binding” process to bind one Matter device with another, and in addition, you have to configure an ACL for the target device to give the controlling device access.
As of this writing, HA does not yet have support for binding. However their Matter Server has an API socket that allows one to do this. I was able to accomplish binding using this API about a year or so ago and it was very difficult. But the following community thread has developed some scripts that perhaps make it more workable (I haven’t tried it):