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For physical volume controls, every Sonos product has them, they only caveat is if you use the Connect or Connect Amp in the basement and run speakers to the rooms, you won’t have them in the room. But you do have options. Harmony Remotes offer Sonos integration, a dedicated tablet, Brilliant Light switches are coming next month and look quite interesting.
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You can use virtually any streaming service with Sonos. They are platform agnostic. I count 64 in my app and so yes all the big players are definitely supported like Google Play, Apple Music, Spotify, Amazon Music etc. You can also use local music via a computer.
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Grouping speakers is dynamic, add or delete speakers, play everywhere etc. You don’t pre-configure anything, just group on the fly. With Home Assistant, you have services you can call to group them too so if you wanted to build scenes it will group and start playing a playlist.
I was also hesitant with Sonos so I bought a Play:1 at Best Buy over a year ago to see if it would work with my needs. I got instantly hooked and kept buying them til I filled my whole house. Give it a try with just one or two and see if it meets your expectations. Worst case, just return it within the 30 days. Hey, I’m sure someone else would love to pick up an open box at reduced price!