I’m also experiencing this issue. Removing and re-adding the server did not help.
So no way to see the action buttons of an actionable notification on iOS without a long press on the notification summary? 
Since my first iPhone in 2009 this is the first issue that is making me seriously consider Android.
Yep.
As a result I only use IOS alerts for critical alerts as it has that emergency setting that will make it announce regardless of the phone settings. Everything else I route through telegram.
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I’ve tried all of the suggestions listed above. I’ve removed and re-added the server in the companion app, deleted and re-installed the companion app and still no action buttons unless a long press. It sounds like it is working for some and not others. Is there no hope of figuring out the exact configuration that works?
That’s the only behavior I get.