do you know if exist a rele 12 volt (Wifi or Zigbee or ZWave) compatible with Home Assistant with (if possibile) an integrated button to turn on / off the load locally on the device?
What you are probably looking for is a dry contact relay?
One of the the smallest I’m aware of (and formally sold for $3) is the Sonoff RE5V1C
A random shelly (1?) thing with dry contact might be another solution which comes with case but misses a button. Still you can just connect any (random) button to the existing terminals