Smart switch / relay behind switch - EU form factor

'm lookin for basic looking smart switches in EU format (preferably, but 240v mains capability required)

Story time:

I wanted to have control over the lights by the rules I set on my computer without changing much of the wiring, as I do have old brick house, so not possible to fish wires as there are not even wire pipes/Corrugated Plastic Tubes, just wires in wall.

I also wanted to have “local” control.

And mostly I wanted to add light switches where there was no wiring.

I went with zigbee and bought tuya switches that has same design for in wall and wireless.

Those: Tuya Go|One-Stop Customized Smart Products Purchasing & Distributing Platform .

So it kinda worked OK with tuya, but occasionally warless ones click would not register and also sometimes automations would be super slow.

I changed to home assistant and zigbee2mqtt, same thing, automations are usually faster, but still click is not registered sometimes and now switches flash the indicator led even when not touched every hour or so and similar issue is with other tuya stuff.

So I looked for something better:

what i would like - ability to use custom firmware (as esphome flashed devices I have just work.) - so that pretty much means esp32 maybe the older esp8266

so far i found

  • sonoff m5
    • only in dark gray, that would be acceptable, but it’s wireless version - r5 - is not zigbee, not bluetooth, but something else
  • aqara e1 - seems nice, i read before that aqara devices tend to disconnect from HA, that is why i went with tuya ones, but i think it is just internet lies
    • it is zigbee, i do not know if it is to be trusted
  • shelly 2 plus … - only have 2 buttons for the actual switch, so sometimes i would need to have 2 behind the wall plate, and i would also need to modify walls to make the installation box deeper to fit both shelly(s) and the wallplate

It needs to be either relay behind regular momentary switch wall plate (at this point it is my prefered solution) or the classic light switch that you press, no fancy touch or dimmer things (it can have dimmer slider hidden to the side or whatever, but primarily needs to be just the button)

it is almost a requirement by me to have option to disconnect button from the relay, so i can assign action without necessarily triggering the relay.

I OKish with just using relay like this Esp8266 Esp-01/01s 5v Wifi Relay Module Things Smart Home Remote Control Switch Phone App Esp01 Esp-01 Wireless Wifi Module - Relays - AliExpress but I did not found one with input from wall button (not really switch as than on/off positions would be messed up when controlling the light from other switch). Maybe this DC 12V 24V Relay Shield WiFi Board Wireless Module ESP8266 ESP 12F Network Relay module control Switch Output 220V 10A ESP12F|Relays| - AliExpress one does (has ESP soldered, so no esp32 option), but I did not found any pinout what are all the connectors there.

HA now supports bluetooth, i do not know if there is anything interesting made for bluetooth, maybe some homekit stuff.

Did i miss some option?

Is here someone who successfully solved same conundrum and is willing to share how?